Panic Attacks

My sign that a panic attack is about to start is the explosion of butterflies in my stomach, my heart begins to race as well and finally I begin to feel like my whole world is caving in on me, like I'm trapped with no where to run.

I am afraid, afraid that everyone is going to leave me, afraid that I'm gonna die because there is this crushing weight on my chest that won't allow me to breathe, afraid that I will never be good enough for anyone, afraid that I'm gonna fail out of school, afraid that I am not loved, afraid that I'm not wanted.

My eyes either begin to go blurry or I begin to get tunnel vision. My heart hurts, like someone is stabbing me.

I am normally with my friends when something like this happens. This does help me because they can remind me that I am loved, I am wanted, I am enough, I can do this. But when I am alone I go into a downward spiral that seems like a never ending tunnel of darkness that I will never get out of.

I know it doesn't seem like it but there is a light at the end of the tunnel, you will break through the surface again, sun will rise again because night time doesn't last forever. I have to remind myself of that morning and night because I know that maybe one day, after everything, I will be okay again.